Same Sinking Feeling

It's the dejavu feeling. Three years ago, that same feeling got smacked into me again. The nightmares seem to unfold with the first sign of refusal. There's so much more costs involved. It is sickening my heart. I try not to tihnk about it too much, even not at all but it's a fierce battle inside. Paralysis of analysis is what it is. I get paralysed quickly in my chair just thinking about the whole damn issue. Why does this happen time and time again? It fucks up the whole progress and I am only praying ernestly for intervention.

But there's still that money and where do I get it from? Bridges have been burnt, so what now my Lord?

j.t.